MATTHEW SHEPARD

For the past six months the book, “The Meaning of Matthew” by Judy Shepard has been on my living room coffee table waiting to be read. It’s the story of Matthew Shepard, who was murdered in Laramie, Wyoming. Matthew was tied to a fence, brutally beaten, and left for dead, for one reason only, because he was gay. Eighteen hours later, a cyclist found him and called for help. Mathew was brought to the ICU of a Fort Collins, CO hospital, where he lingered for three more days before passing on.

This book was published in 2009, but my fear of reading this tragic mothers story paralyzed me from purchasing it. The reason I finally was able to buy it was because I knew having the book in my home was the first step to facing my fear. I was feeling like a hypocrite during that time because I’m always touting the phrases “fear is a four letter word” and “eliminate fear with education” but I was unable to take my own advice. Guilty as charged.

Last week I could no longer hide from the fact that this mother had an important story to tell and I was going to read it. I knew my heart would ache for days just thinking about the pain this family endured but the time had come to face my fear.

I read this book in one day. From the first page, the simple dialogue captures the reader. I did not stop, going from one chapter to the next, until the last page was turned. I felt it would have been disrespectful to put the book down before Mrs. Shepard finished her story. It was as if I was at a PFLAG meeting and Matthew Shepard’s mom was telling her story.

“The Meaning of Matthew”, shows the power of healing, how an event so horrific can be used for the greater good. This courageous family has made the loss of Matthew a teachable moment, exposing the homophobic culture that exists in our country and the world. They have created the Matthew Shepard Foundation, www.matthewshepard.org, to honor their son. The goal for the foundation is to replace hate and ignorance with understanding, compassion and acceptance.

I strongly urge each and everyone who reads this blog to read this book. Yes, it will make your heart ache and scare you to tears, but don’t be afraid like I was, finding your courage sets you free.

hugs, Barbara

KUDOS FOR CHRONICLE!

KUDOS FOR CHRONICLE!

On Thursday, February 24^th, Chronicle aired a show called “Growing up Gay”. It was co-hosted by Randy Price, who is a gay news anchor on Channel 5 and featured Steve Buckley, radio personality and sports writer for the Boston Herald, who recently came out. The show also featured a young man, who attempted suicide when he was in high school, along with his dad and a great piece about a young bi-racial man who found a safe place to land at Brighton High School, thanks to an openly lesbian English teacher that runs the high school’s Gay/Straight/Alliance Program. Each segment had a powerful story to tell and kudos to Chronicle for featuring such programs as the GSA. It is so important for our children to be aware of the support that’s out there, the statistics show that a frightening one in three gay youths have attempted suicide.

As I watched this program, I thought how lucky are we to be living in Massachusetts and why it is so important. A show like this would never be aired in Florida, Texas or Alabama, just to name a few. We are so fortunate to have forward thinking individuals making good decisions for all the people in our great state.

We have successful professional gay men and women living very public lives here in the Bay State and they are the role models for our children’s future. They are giving them hope that when they grow up and start a career, they too can be openly gay and successful.

I can’t leave out something I saw on Oprah last week. Lisa Ling has a series on Oprah’s OWN network called “Our America with Lisa Ling”, which does stories on all different types of people in living in America. This particular story was about a couple living in New England, I believe in Massachusetts, who had a son named Harry who transgendered to a girl, Hailey, at the age of three. She is now seven years old and lives her life as female. I think her parents have shown the courage and strength of our greatest warriors, they have released her from a life of pain and anguish that so many men and women, who struggle with the decision to transgender, but do not have the support of a loving family. Granted, there are always challenges for our children, gay, straight or transgender, but when they have a loving family supporting them, love always wins over hate. For a person longing to live as another gender, it is not living, it’s merely existing.

PFLAG makes life for our children worth living. With the programs they create and the work that they do enable me to write about the success stories in this post. We all can make a difference and when you do, you become a better you, too!

hugs, Barbara